How be so good they can’t ignore you: 10 undeniable steps

Want to be so good they can’t ignore you? There’s a specific path to get there, and it’s not what most people think.

Most creators chase passion and end up lost. They follow their hearts hoping success will naturally follow.

What if they’ve got it completely backwards?

I discovered a life-changing truth when I dropped out of law school: being so good they can’t ignore you isn’t about finding your passion. It’s about building exceptional skills that make you undeniable.

This guide reveals the exact system I’ve used to build multiple successful businesses and design a life of complete freedom.

What does it mean to “be so good they can’t ignore you”?

This approach flips conventional wisdom on its head. Instead of pursuing passion first and hoping success follows, you focus on building exceptional skills and let passion develop naturally through the mastery process.

This approach flips conventional wisdom on its head. Instead of pursuing passion first and hoping success follows, you focus on building exceptional skills first.

As you develop mastery, you gain leverage. This leverage gives you the power to design work on your terms. You create the freedom, impact, and fulfillment most people believe comes from following passion.

This powerful concept comes from comedian Steve Martin. When asked for advice by aspiring performers, he didn’t suggest following dreams. He told them to become exceptional first.

Cal Newport expanded on this idea in his groundbreaking book. It immediately explained my own journey.

I had invested years in law school. I thought I was on the right path. Then my brother Simon passed away in 2013. Everything changed.

I left the “safe” path to explore what truly resonated with me.

I didn’t have a burning passion for virtual summits or online business. I simply saw an opportunity to create value. I decided to become exceptionally good at it.

When I interviewed Robert Greene, he told me:

This really hit home for me.

This isn’t about talent or luck. It’s about deliberate skill-building.

When I built my virtual summit expertise, I didn’t just host some random online events.

I created a system that my students I used to collectively generated millions of email subscribers and 10’s of millions of dollars in sales in any industry you can think of.

That’s the difference between passion and skill: measurable results.

The passion trap vs the skill-based approach

Most success advice falls into two camps: “follow your passion” or “build valuable skills first.”

But which approach actually works?

I’ve tested both approaches in my own journey and studied hundreds of successful entrepreneurs. Here’s the unfiltered truth about each path:

The “follow your passion” advice sounds inspiring on Instagram. In reality, it’s deeply flawed.

When I interviewed Cal Newport, author of “So Good They Can’t Ignore You,” he explained why:

Look at Steve Jobs. The year before Apple was founded, he showed little interest in technology. He was drawn to Eastern mysticism! Apple wasn’t his lifelong passion — it became his passion through creating something valuable.

The reality: passion develops alongside mastery. You don’t discover it first then pursue it.

The passion vs skills debate: What really works?

Most success advice falls into two camps: “follow your passion” or “build valuable skills first.”

But which approach actually works?

I’ve tested both approaches in my own journey and studied hundreds of successful entrepreneurs. Here’s the unfiltered truth about each path:

Why “follow your passion” sounds good (but often fails)

The “follow your passion” approach is everywhere. It’s in graduation speeches, bestselling books, and Instagram captions.

Here’s why it’s appealing:

Instant motivation: When you love something, showing up is easier. You naturally invest more time and energy.

Authentic connection: Starting with what you love creates a deeper connection to your work.

Emotional satisfaction: It feels good to pursue what excites you. It aligns with how we want the world to work.

But here’s the problem: passion without skills rarely creates value. And without creating value, you can’t build freedom.

I see this constantly. Passionate creators who can’t understand why their enthusiasm isn’t translating to success.

The reason? They’re skipping a critical step.

Why the “skills first” approach actually delivers

The alternative approach—building valuable skills before expecting passion—isn’t as sexy. But it consistently delivers results:

Market reality: The market pays for value, not passion. Developing rare, valuable skills creates real opportunities.

Passion development: As you get better at something, you typically enjoy it more. Excellence fuels enthusiasm.

Growing options: Career capital gives you leverage to design work on your terms.

Clear next steps: Instead of endless soul-searching, you focus on deliberate improvement.

Look at the patterns:

Marie Forleo developed skills in coaching and communication first. Her passion grew as she mastered her craft and saw her impact expand.

Tim Ferriss methodically built skills in testing and optimization before developing his passion for lifestyle design.

Casey Neistat became exceptional at visual storytelling through years of deliberate practice, with his enthusiasm growing alongside his mastery.

Each started with skills, not passion. And each ended up with both.

The strategic sweet spot: my approach

After years of experimentation, I’ve found the most powerful path combines elements of both approaches:

1. Start with interest, Not passion: You don’t need burning passion — just enough interest to fuel consistent practice.
2. Focus on value first: Develop skills people actually value, not just what feels good.
3. Create feedback loops: Build systems to measure your improvement and impact.
4. Let passion emerge naturally: Stay open to discovering unexpected enthusiasm as you develop mastery.
5. Design your path intentionally: Use your growing career capital to shape a life that brings true freedom.

This balanced approach avoids both the “just follow your bliss” fantasy and the soulless “ignore what you enjoy” trap.

What I’ve discovered is simple but powerful: passion isn’t the starting point — it’s what happens when you become exceptional at something valuable.

And that’s a path anyone can follow.

Finding your ikigai through mastery, not just passion

While many interpret ikigai (your “reason for being”) as finding your passion, the true power of this Japanese concept lies in its completeness.

Ikigai emerges at the intersection of:

• What you love (passion)
• What you’re good at (skill)
• What the world needs (purpose)
• What you can be paid for (value)

Most people make a critical mistake. They start with passion alone. I’ve learned that by first developing exceptional skills, you naturally discover what you love in the process.

True Ikigai isn’t just about finding work you love — it’s about building a complete life that gives you freedom, meaning, and impact.

How to be so good they can’t ignore you: 10 proven steps to follow

Now that you understand why becoming exceptional at what you do is the path to work you love, let’s break down the exact steps to make it happen.

These aren’t theoretical concepts. They’re the same steps I’ve used to build multiple successful businesses and design a life of freedom on my terms.

Each step builds on the previous one, creating a systematic path to be so good they can’t ignore you.

Step 1: Adopt the craftsman mindset

The craftsman mindset focuses on what you can offer the world. The passion mindset obsesses over what the world offers you.

This mental shift changes everything:

Passion mindset:

• “Is this the right path for me?”
• “Am I truly passionate about this?”
• “What should I be doing with my life?”

Craftsman mindset:

• “How can I deliver exceptional value?”
• “What skills can I develop to become extraordinary?”
• “How can I improve my work by 1% today?”

When I started my online lifestyle business, I wasn’t passionate about virtual summits. I simply saw an opportunity to create value and decided to become exceptionally good at it.

I put in countless hours mastering this craft — learning to secure high-profile speakers, creating compelling content, and designing effective funnels. The deeper I went into mastery, the more my passion grew.

Cal Newport puts it perfectly:

Action steps

• Identify one valuable skill in your field that you can focus on improving
• Create a 30-day plan to deliberately improve that skill through daily practice
• Start measuring your improvement with concrete metrics

Step 2: Ruthlessly track your time & energy

You can’t improve what you don’t measure. Most people have no idea where their time actually goes.

Time isn’t just money. Time is your life. And how you spend it determines what you’ll become.

Robert Greene told me in our interview:

Start by tracking exactly where your time goes for a full week. You’ll be shocked.

Most people discover they spend less than 20% of their time on high-value activities that build valuable skills. The rest disappears into low-value work, distractions, and busy work.

Your goal: spend at least 50% of your working time on skill-building activities that make you better at your craft.

Action steps

• Track every 30-minute block of your working time for one full week
• Identify your 3 highest-value activities that build rare and valuable skills
• Eliminate or delegate at least 3 low-value activities that don’t contribute to your mastery

Step 3: Master the art of deep work

Excellence requires focused attention. Yet we live in a world designed to fragment our focus.

Deep work is the ability to concentrate without distraction on demanding tasks. It has become the ultimate competitive advantage.

Cal Newport explains:

I protect my focus relentlessly:

• No social media during deep work sessions
• Structured time blocks for focused creation
• Environment designed for concentration
• Clear boundaries between deep and shallow work

When I built my first summit that generated $20,000+ in profit, I dedicated focused blocks of 3-4 hours daily to the most important tasks — not answering emails or scrolling through social media.

Action steps

• Schedule three 90-minute deep work sessions this week
• Turn off all notifications during these sessions
• Create a pre-deep work ritual to signal to your brain it’s time to focus
• Design your environment to eliminate potential distractions

Step 4: Practice deliberately, not mindlessly

Most people plateau because they practice incorrectly. They repeat what they already know instead of pushing beyond their comfort zone.

Deliberate practice is different. It’s structured, challenging, and designed to improve specific aspects of performance.

When I decided to master virtual summits, I broke down the process into specific components:

• Crafting compelling outreach emails (practicing by reaching out to 10+ influencers daily)
• Designing high-converting summit pages (testing designs and tracking conversion rates)
• Creating valuable summit sessions (studying interviewing techniques from masters)
• Building effective follow-up sequences (testing different approaches)

For each component, I set specific goals, stretched beyond my comfort zone, and sought immediate feedback.

Robert Greene explained to me:

Action steps

• Identify the three most valuable skills in your field
• Break each skill into 3-5 specific sub-components
• Design practice activities that push you slightly beyond your current ability
• Create immediate feedback mechanisms for each practice session

Step 5: Stack rare & valuable skills

Being good at one thing is valuable. Being good at a unique combination of things makes you irreplaceable.

Robert Greene told me something that stuck with me for over 10 years:

This is your path to becoming truly undeniable.

Most people develop skills randomly. The most successful people strategically stack complementary skills that create unique value.

My success came from combining several key skills:

• Virtual event production
• Online marketing
• Relationship building
• Content creation
• Systems thinking

None of these skills alone would make me exceptional. The combination makes me unique.

Tim Ferriss calls this “skill stacking.”

Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert, describes it as being “in the top 25% of several skills rather than the top 1% of just one.“

Action steps

• List your current valuable skills
• Identify 1-2 complementary skills that would create a unique combination
• Develop a 30-day plan to start building that next skill
• Look for opportunities to combine your skills in ways others don’t

Step 6: Build & leverage career capital

Your ability to create freedom and impact depends on having something valuable to offer.

This is what Cal Newport calls “career capital” — rare and valuable skills that give you leverage.

The more career capital you acquire, the more options you have:

• Greater autonomy over your time
• More impact on your field
• Higher compensation for your work
• Better opportunities to do meaningful work

When I built my expertise in virtual summits, I gained the freedom to work from anywhere as a digital nomad and becoming a global citizen (visiting over 50 countries, and living in 10+), choose my projects, and command premium prices.

This capital didn’t come from following passion — it came from becoming exceptionally good at something valuable.

Cal Newport explains:

Action steps

• Research the top performers in your field
• Identify what specific skills they’ve mastered that others haven’t
• Create a “career capital acquisition plan” focused on developing those skills systematically
• Start documenting your results to demonstrate your growing career capital

Step 7: Let the market be your guide

The ultimate test of your value isn’t how you feel about your work. It’s whether people will pay for it.

Derek Sivers taught Cal Newport what he calls “the law of financial viability“: if people won’t pay you for it, you haven’t created enough value yet.

Money is the most honest feedback mechanism. It cuts through subjective opinions and tells you objectively whether your skills are valuable.

When I was developing my virtual summit expertise, I didn’t just assume it was valuable. I tested it in the market:

• Would people pay to attend?
• Would speakers invest their time?
• Would speakers and partners promote the event?
• Would sponsors invest their money?

The market’s response was clear: yes, yes, yes and yes.

That validation gave me confidence to double down on developing those skills further.

Action steps

• Identify a way to test your current skills in the market
• Create a small offering that requires people to pay you
• Use the market response to guide your next skill development focus
• Be willing to pivot if the market doesn’t value what you’re offering

Step 8: Define your anti-goals

Just as important as what you do is what you deliberately choose not to do.

Most people dilute their focus by saying yes to everything. Masters become great by saying no to almost everything.

Warren Buffett said:

Anti-goals are the things you actively avoid — the distractions, temptations, and low-value activities that would prevent you from developing rare and valuable skills.

My anti-goals include:

• No meetings before noon (protects deep work time)
• No social media during work sessions
• No projects that don’t leverage my core skills
• No low-budget clients who don’t value expertise

These boundaries have protected my ability to focus on what truly matters.

Action steps:

• Identify your 3-5 biggest distractions and time-wasters
• Create firm boundaries to eliminate these from your life
• Define what types of work or clients you will no longer accept
• Share your anti-goals with someone who will hold you accountable

Step 9: Transform mastery into mission

Most people try to find their mission before they’ve developed any real expertise. This approach almost always fails.

Cal Newport’s research reveals something counterintuitive: meaningful missions often become visible only after you’ve reached the cutting edge of your field.

When I reached a certain level of mastery with virtual summits, I could see opportunities and needs that were invisible to me before. My mission of helping entrepreneurs build audiences through virtual events emerged naturally from this expertise.

Robert Greene told me:

To discover your mission:

1. Focus on getting good first – Build expertise before worrying about your “calling”
2. Explore the adjacent possible – Look for innovative opportunities at the edge of your expertise
3. Test small mission-driven projects – Use “little bets” to explore potential directions
4. Follow the evidence – Let market feedback guide your mission refinement

Action steps

• Identify three areas at the cutting edge of your field where your skills could create unique value
• Start a small project in one of these areas to test its resonance and potential
• Look for problems only someone with your unique skill combination can solve
• Pay attention to what naturally excites you as your skills develop

Step 10: Position yourself as undeniable

In a crowded marketplace, being good isn’t enough. You must be remarkable — worthy of being remarked upon.

Cal Newport calls this the “Law of Remarkability.” It’s not just about skill; it’s about applying that skill in a way that stands out.

Three ways to become remarkable:

1. Do something different: Create a unique approach or perspective
2. Do something first: Pioneer a new technique or solution
3. Do something better: Take existing concepts to unprecedented levels

When I positioned myself as the world’s leading virtual summit expert, I didn’t just host summits — I developed a comprehensive system, documented my results, and taught others to replicate my success.

This remarkability wasn’t about self-promotion. It came from genuine expertise and results that spoke for themselves.

Robert Greene emphasized to me:

Action steps

• Define your remarkable positioning based on your unique skill combination
• Document your process, results, and insights in a way others can learn from
• Create content that demonstrates your unique approach and expertise
• Build a platform that showcases your remarkable results

The Undeniable OS™ action plan

Ready to be so good they can’t ignore you?

This action plan breaks down exactly how to implement each step of The Undeniable OS™ over the next 90 days.

Week 1-2: Foundation building

• Complete the Craftsman Mindset Assessment (identify what valuable skills you can develop)
• Implement a time-tracking system for 14 consecutive days
• Schedule your first three deep work sessions (90 minutes each)
• Define your first deliberate practice challenge

Week 3-4: Skill development initiation

• Analyze your time tracking data and eliminate low-value activities
• Increase deep work sessions to 5 per week
• Select your first new skill to stack with your existing abilities
• Create feedback mechanisms for your deliberate practice

Week 5-8: Career capital acceleration

• Start documenting your skill improvements with tangible metrics
• Test your skills in the market with a small paid offering
• Draft your anti-goals list and share it with an accountability partner
• Begin researching the cutting edge of your field for mission opportunities

Week 9-12: Positioning for remarkability

• Develop your first “remarkable” project that showcases your best skills
• Create documentation of your process and results
• Refine your positioning statement based on your unique skill stack
• Launch your work publicly with clear metrics for success

The maintenance system (ongoing)

• Bi-annual mission refinement
• Weekly review of deep work hours and skill development progress
• Monthly assessment of career capital growth
• Quarterly remarkability project planning

Accelerate your mastery with AI: The undeniable advantage

In your journey to be so good they can’t ignore you, AI can be your secret weapon for accelerated skill development.

I’ve developed three powerful prompts that work with ChatGPT, Claude, or any modern AI assistant.

These prompts are specifically designed to complement the Undeniable OS™ and help you implement the principles in this guide.

How to use these prompts:

1. Copy the entire prompt (including all instructions and structure)
2. Paste it into your preferred AI tool (ChatGPT, Claude, etc.)
3. Replace the [BRACKETED TEXT] with your specific details
4. Use the AI-generated outputs to accelerate your implementation

By combining the timeless principles of becoming so good they can’t ignore you with cutting-edge AI tools, you create an unstoppable advantage.

The discipline is still yours. The execution is still yours. But the strategic insights and frameworks can be enhanced through these digital thinking partners.

Essential resources for mastering your craft

To accelerate your journey toward being so good they can’t ignore you, here are some of my favorite books, top creator tools and other resources I personally use and recommend:

Must-read books

Learning platforms

Productivity tools

• Freedom – Block distracting websites during deep work sessions
• RescueTime – Track how you spend your time and optimize for deep work
• Pomodoro Technique Apps – Structure your work into focused intervals

Remember: Tools amplify your skills — they don’t replace them. Invest in learning the fundamentals first, then use these resources to accelerate your growth.

FAQs

Got questions about implementing this approach?

Here are answers to the most common questions I receive about becoming exceptional at what you do.

Next steps: Your path to becoming undeniable

Being so good they can’t ignore you isn’t about overnight success or finding some hidden passion. It’s about the daily discipline of getting 1% better, focusing on what truly matters, and creating exceptional value.

This approach transformed my life — from a law school dropout to a successful entrepreneur who’s built multiple businesses and helped thousands of others do the same.

The path to excellence isn’t always easy, but it’s infinitely more reliable than waiting for passion to strike or opportunities to appear.

Don’t follow your passion. Build your skills. Let passion follow you.

Which of these ten steps resonates most with you right now?

Are you ready to shift from the passion mindset to the craftsman mindset? What skill could you start deliberately practicing today that would make you more valuable tomorrow?

Remember: Success isn’t random. It’s built through discipline, systems, and execution—one day at a time.